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When Procrastination Is Trauma: A New Lens on Avoidance
Procrastination is often dismissed as laziness, lack of discipline, or a bad habit. But for many trauma survivors, it’s one of the most chronic, shame-filled, and debilitating struggles they face every day.
It can feel irrational, self-defeating, even humiliating. Clinicians sometimes minimize it too, treating it as a simple behavioral issue rather than a complex, protective, and adaptive strategy rooted in the past.
The word itself comes from the Latin procrastinare, meaning “to postpone until tomorrow.” Popular self-help literature from the 1970s and 1980s framed procrastination as a moral failure, a sign of laziness or lack of productivity. But what if we understood it through a trauma-informed lens?
When Something Feels Off: Let Your Body Be the Guide
If you want to heal from trauma, one of the most powerful places to begin is with your current relationships. Start by simply noticing how you feel—emotionally and physically—around the people in your life. Your body often knows the truth before your mind can catch up.
Many adult trauma survivors find themselves stuck in painful relationship patterns without realizing it. These aren’t always the obvious signs of harm like yelling or hitting. More often, it’s subtle dynamics: abandoning yourself during conversations, taking on others’ problems as your own, feeling guilt or shame when you can’t meet someone’s needs, or constantly giving without receiving in return.
So how do you know if this is happening to you?
Do I have PTSD? Common Signs You Shouldn’t Ignore
As a trauma therapist, I’m often asked this question. PTSD doesn’t always show up the way people expect. Here are some of the most common signs:
Intrusive memories — Flashbacks, nightmares, or unwanted thoughts about something traumatic from your past.
Emotional disconnection — Feeling numb, spaced out, or like you’re not fully in your body.
Strong reactions to small triggers — Feeling anxious, irritable, jumpy, or constantly “on edge.”
Avoidance — Staying away from people, places, or emotions that remind you of what happened.
People-pleasing — Putting others’ needs ahead of your own to feel safe or avoid conflict.
Procrastination — Struggling to start tasks or follow through, especially when overwhelmed.
Body and sleep changes — Trouble sleeping, fatigue, or feeling stuck in fight, flight, freeze, fawn, or shut-down mode.
Disordered Eating & Trauma Survivors
As a trauma therapist, I’ve worked with many patients who developed eating disorders in the aftermath of childhood trauma. I want to share some of what I’ve learned about how trauma, dissociation, and disordered eating often intertwine.
When children can’t physically escape trauma, behaviors like purging, bingeing, or restricting may offer a way to disconnect from overwhelming and painful emotions. Food is often the first “substance” available to soothe distress—long before drugs or alcohol enter the picture. Research also shows that dissociation predicts overeating and can intensify binge episodes.
Male Survivors of Sexual Trauma
We don’t talk enough about the sexual abuse of boys and men. According to a 2025 article, an estimated 6.2%–18.8% of boys and at least 3.8% of men report experiencing sexual trauma in adulthood. But the real numbers are likely much higher—because many men never tell.
Depersonalization: Where Does it fit in?
Let’s talk about dissociation and trauma. First, dissociation is normal and all people have varying degrees of it from daydreaming in class, getting absorbed in a book or binge watching a show to Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) where there are periods of amnesia where you lose track of time like finding yourself in a place you don’t remember getting to or wearing clothes you don’t remember putting on.